Absence, busyness, and vacancy

So you see--there is a huge gap on this blog. No deeply meaningless quandries by a man who debates with himself what really is going on in life. Who is it that God wants me to be...and you to be. And I got to thinking, I have been absent from this blog, yet very busy in other areas of life. So busy, that at times I wonder if there is any vacancy in life. But then again, everyone, and I do mean everyone, always says they are so busy that they can't get to stuff that just isn't a priority to them. Like keeping in touch with the grandparents (yep, I'm guilty of this) or getting around to washing your clothes to starting a new hobby.

I know I am busy--but really...I don't feel all that busy. I feel good about my life right now. Yeah, there are DEFINITELY areas for improvement--things I need to do better or ways to grow closer to God and others, but overall, I feel God moving in me. He is in control--and that, I think, is always important to realize when talking about life. To not try and take control, seize every moment of every day for personal use. Because in everything, God is. In everything. In driving to work, in work, in brushing my teeth. God is there, wanting my praise. So I should praise Him. And when I do--I realize that I don't feel busy. And so sometimes, do we need to empty out a schedule a bit--so God can lead us to praise Him--to worship Him, thank Him, pray to Him, read His words to us. And incorporate that in life--not just a morning, or evening, but in our lunch break, in my staring at a computer doing work all day, in my conversations with others. Keep Him there--praise Him, thank Him, remember Him.

Lord, I pray that I am more consciously aware of You throughout the day. To really believe in You, that You have a better way. So when temptations come, they are easily defeated by Your Spirit. Give me the faith to ALWAYS believe this. Help me to be a servant.

Patterns, Habits, Homeostasis

Doesn't it seem very hard to break certain routines in our life? The ones I know I notice are always the "bad" ones--the ones I don't particularly want to do. Like getting frustrated and impatient in traffic. But there are so many more. I have heard different sources give different lengths of time that our bodies need to create or break a habit--28 days, 40 days, etc. I'm not going to argue the length; but I do know that habits are powerful. Either good or bad. For instance, I do have a good habit of doing a daily reading, etc. in the morning during the work week. Almost never miss it--and those only on days that don't go according to the norm. But that habit is ingrained.

Our bodies do try to maintain Homeostasis--or the status quo. Even when we are doing something to stimulate our "pleasure" receptors...or pain, or whatever, the body is still maintaining homeostasis. This is why, for instance, you develop a "tolerance" to alcohol as you drink more. But it also can be unhealthy--because the alcohol is still affecting your system, but your body is trying to prevent itself from changing, while at the same time you are seeking that "pleasurable" sensation.

So this is just a little bit of how our bodies work--against us and for us. When we are fighting this battle of Spirit versus Flesh, we do need to know our enemy, just as we need to know our enemy in physical fights (wars, etc).

But as we get to know--we do need to prepare, and we can't break our own flesh on our own. We don't have that power alone--or else our body wouldn't already have these systems in place. So the challenge, I think, is to continually turn to God, the power He has promised us through Christ in the Spirit. I know I need to remember this way more often than I do. Like remember this every second of every day.

God, help me to break those patterns in my life that are the flesh, and not the Spirit. You know what they are, even better than I do. Send your Spirit to convict me to change my ways, to bring me to you, to give me freedom.

Is being a Christian a mental illness?

Just noticed the following article on the MSNBC Website this morning.

http://msnbc.msn.com/id/11955289/

It is about a man in Afghanistan (Abdul Rahman, 41) who converted from Islam to Christianity that is in their courts now, seeking the death penalty. This in itself shows one of the large differences in the religions, and unfortunately isn't all that new. But it is a reminder that this type of persecution still exists in the world today. If you want to see more of what is going on worldwide--Voice of the Martyrs is a somber resource that shows (and the book a few years ago that came out by dc Talk--Jesus Freaks, has many a story of present day persecution).

But what really got me was how the defense was orienting his defense that the man was mentally ill. Because if he is, then Islam provides for forgiveness and not death--because the mentally ill are not able to understand their actions. State prosecutor Sarinwal Zamari said of the man:' “We think he could be mad. He is not a normal person. He doesn’t talk like a normal person,” he told The Associated Press.' (see link above as the resource) Police have said they will drop charges if he converts back to Islam, which he refused. And what started all of this was finding a Bible in his possession.

As a Christian, I do want to pray for this man...and for this country. But also, to think about my faith, your faith, all of our faiths. Would I be willing to "save" my life by going with the mentally ill plea--or would I lose it and stick to what I believe. I know what I would do (or at least think I would do--since I am not in that situation). Because the Bible does say, "He who tries to save his life will lose it, but he who would lose his life for me will save it." (ok--that is a paraphrase--I don't have my Bible in front of me, forgive me if I messed it up a little, but the point is the same).

So how about you? Would you be able to stand up to this scrutiny, and prove that you are not mentally ill...but that you have been changed by the power of Christ's blood?

Afraid of death?

I read in my daily devotional a few days ago about heaven and hell--and how it can motivate us, or scare us to do something. Now I DO NOT think that this is the point of it all, to be scared--because there is to be no fear in love...and we are to love. But this idea of death, and judgement--we see it in lots of stories of people hanging on to life. Of survival through adverse situations.

And it got me thinking--why is it that this is so noble, so good to us to hear? Beat the bad guys, persevere, struggle against the demons in our life, and live?

And then something else, that the Apostle Paul said--"to live is Christ, to die is gain." This seems almost opposite of what a lot of us think at times.

Now I know where I am at, and having spent a year in Iraq, I know how I have faced some near-death scenarios, but what is it that God really wants. I think it really does boil down to that statement of Paul's.

We shouldn't be afraid of dying--it should be looked forward to when it happens. But we should also know, and have peace about, our life here, that we have the joy to live each daily to the full--for Christ! Because when it's over, it's over and we are on to heaven. And that will be beyond our wildest imaginations. I am really thinking this is the attitude to have...to live life, but not be attached to it...at least not this worldly life.

I am interested to hear other viewpoints...cause I by no means think I am the expert on this.

And I shall call it...Preparation H

This idea of how certain phrases, certain words over time change in meaning--especially slang meaning is interesting to me. Take, for instance, the name Dick. Even just one generation ago or so it was a common name, with no double meaning...really. But when it is said now (even in this post) it makes some squirm, or snicker, because of the double entendre. And there are so many more...look at all the comedy movies out there that are a play on words--or Letterman or Leno.

Why is it that we change words like this--how this is creative and funny, hip or cool. Language is so interesting with how it evolves over time, in every location. Cities, the South, the Northeast, etc. etc. all have accents, certain words used, that are just different. Bad means good when said in a certain way (ok, that was particularly in use a few years ago).

But my point, I guess, is are we keeping up with how to communicate with each other. Is the message being lost in translation? Paul and the other Apostles had to mold their messages to the Gentiles in various locations. Missionaries have adapted the story of Christ to the local tribe culture. Our language is part of our culture--how we can relate and communicate with each other. Are we, as Christians, adapting, or keeping staunch, expecting others to change to us?

I am not saying we compromise the core of Christianity--by no means. But we should reach out, adapt our language, our styles, to those around us. To bind and loose...as Jesus commanded the Apostles.

I've been thinking about something said last night by a woman named Michelle--that she lives without care for what others are going to do. She does this because she is in love with Jesus, and knows that she will be die when God is done with her. This is a thought that I have had, too--especially when doing military operations in Iraq. But it was the faith she had, with such emotion, that was truly amazing. She was going to go do what God was calling her to do...and leaving it at that. She was going to spread the Gospel. I really feel like there is something to this, that we all should get to. That there really is no separation in our lives, between God and our careers, family, etc. I know it is something that as I think about...I want it more and more. I want to be God's, fully and completely. I want everything I do, in each and every moment of the day, to be serving His kingdom and glory. Right now, in the military, it can seem hard to do that at times, because I have to do what my job requires. But it is in the attitude, the caring, that I can still be completely His. Am I a light all the time--unfortunately, no. But I want to be. I want to be God's. I love Him, so I shouldn't care what others think. Look at all the persecution that has happened--my co-workers can't even touch that. So what am I afraid of? Nothing, if I am in love; God's love.

Lord, help me, help us all, to put aside worldly pretenses and cares and just live for You. You have actions in store for us, to further Your kingdom. Help us to realize this, and not care what the world thinks...except of course that they know we are Christians by our love.

Honest question...

OK...so here is a question I am wrestling with...and for some reason it just doesn't seem like I can cross the threshold that I want, to grow closer to God.

How do I Stand Firm in the truth. I mean day to day, honest, real standing firm. It seems like I do so great for awhile, reading, praying, staying connected to God--but then there are the moments when it seems like I never put up a resistance. I know I have more success than failure, but the failure is still there at times. It may not even be the same things, and it isn't like I am saying that I am falling from God--but more just trying to get through this life, growing closer. And right now I feel that somehow this is one of the areas that I am keeping God at arm's length. Really and truly stand in Him--love him with all my STENGTH! Every breath, every muscle, every action...

Too idealistic? Maybe, but I think it is where God wants us, wants me.